Sorry about the darkness

29/02/2016

 Amber Valletta photographed by Glen Luchford for Prada Fall/Winter 1997 campaign
That's the thing about life... You think you are all set, flying through time comfortably and then, when you least expect it, that very same life punches you right in the stomach so hard that for a moment there, you simply cannot breathe at all.

It felt that we just about got to that turbulence-free point, with the pup, the house, the prettiest little garden, work-play balance, you name it. And then everything changed practically overnight. The pup was gone and with him our hearts and mind somehow crushed... In that past life we had a plan of living, the three of us, in our home with a pretty little garden, for another ten years or so. The timing was always about the pup... Whenever we thought of the future without him, we pictured ourselves swapping this house of ours for a beautiful converted apartment, just like the one we had before, but bigger - 19th century, original shutters and features, windows to the floor and the ceilings so high you'd have to get special people involved to repaint them. 

And then, like in a horrible nightmare that should had never come true, there was no more pup, just like that. That part of our lives, the whole "pretty little home, pretty little garden, just the three of us" scenario was over. After scraping through days without him for three weeks we finally agreed that it's time to start a new chapter and move away from the painfully familiar streets and the house that was created and decorated for the three of us, never - a duo. We talked and talked until there's no more reason to sit and wait, but put the house on the market. 

 Amber Valletta photographed by Glen Luchford for Prada Fall/Winter 1997 campaign
 Amber Valletta photographed by Glen Luchford for Prada Fall/Winter 1997 campaign
Yes, it feels odd, but it also a relieve in a way. With the spring around the corner and the sun shining through my window, the life moves on and we move along. With broken hearts, but embracing the thought of the future.

Oh, yes, and the photos are from one of my favourite Prada campaigns of all times... They may not reflect the light of a glorious Monday afternoon, but are a perfect image of my inner world right. Sorry about the darkness.

 Amber Valletta photographed by Glen Luchford for Prada Fall/Winter 1997 campaign
 Amber Valletta photographed by Glen Luchford for Prada Fall/Winter 1997 campaign
 Amber Valletta photographed by Glen Luchford for Prada Fall/Winter 1997 campaign
Photo source: Amber Valletta photographed by Glen Luchford for Prada Fall/Winter 1997 campaign

7 comments:

  1. Amber!!!! One of my fave campaigns too. Sigh.

    I am so sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to fathom what that feels like. I hope you find comfort in your new surroundings.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Elle. It's getting easier now. At least I can talk about it without crying, so something must be changing. x

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  2. So sorry to hear about your loss Amber. I hope you find comfort and peace.

    Danielle
    http://www.blushblossom.com

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  3. Oh, that's going to be a major change! Well, hopefully it is going to be the transition towards new beginnings and happier times.

    Luxessed

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  4. Natalia, I understand. You're making the right decision if things no longer feel right where you are currently. It will lead you to new places and things. Change can be very good. There's more in store for you :)
    http://www.averysweetblog.com/

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  5. Although for me it wasn't about a pup, I understand this feeling so completely. When we came back from Paris, our home was not home anymore and for the past two years it has been nothing but a painful reminder that we had to come back from a place we never wanted to leave to a place we weren't very happy to start with. I am so relieved to have left it behind now and I know you will feel the same when you leave your house behind and can focus, as time goes on, on the good memories that you had there with Oscar as a trio.
    xox,
    Cee

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